Greetings Ladies and Gents. My name is Jarrell Liner, the new DeVine Choices guest blogger that will be bringing you the "GROOMDAMENTALS". Now, you may be asking yourself "What are Groomdamentals?" Well, I am happy to tell you that the Groomdamentals are fundamental points of knowledge that every Groom should know and utilize before and during the coveted engagement to his beautiful bride to be. I am sure that you have already figured out that the Groomdamentals are given from a male perspective...I guess that the fact that I am a male myself kind of gave that away! As a former "Groom to be", I can understand how Grooms can feel that the whole engagement and wedding process can be a little overwhelming, a big headache, and all about the bride. Well, I hate to tell you this fellas, but IT IS all about the Bride! The sooner that you figure that out, the easier things will be on you. Trust me.
Now, the fact that the wedding planning process may be all about the Bride doesn't mean that you don't matter and that you have just signed up to be the errand servant and an emotional punching bag for your Bride to release her stress out on...even though there will be times, as a matter of fact most of the time, that you will feel this way. Fellas, we all have to understand that for a woman her wedding day is the most important day of her life. Believe me when I tell you that she has been planning this day since she was 5 years old and nobody, including you, is going to mess this up for her. The most important role that you can play during your engagement is to be supportive of her and a willing participant in any and all activities that she needs you to assist with. As a matter of fact, you can gain kudos from your Bride to be by being proactive and asking her if she needs your help. More times then not she will say; "No thanks, I got it" but knowing that you offered will keep you on her good side. I know, I know, you really don't care about what color that the table liners are at the reception, and you don't really care where you get married at because as long as you are marrying the woman that you love, then nothing else matters... but if you want to prevent your beautiful Bride from transforming into the well known and feared "Bridezilla" then you will participate with a smile! Pick your battles wisely, remembering that every concession you make at this stage of the relationship pays off threefold in the honeymoon suite.
I will say this, if the wedding planning process becomes a strain on your relationship, which it probably will, step up and suggest a good wedding planner that can help ease this stress for both of you (I recommend Tannie Barnes ). By doing this, you will be showing initiative and involvement in the whole process and ultimately you will me making the days leading up to your wedding go a lot smoother and calmer for you and your beautiful Bride to be.
Now, this is how the Groomdamentals will work. Every first Monday of the month, I will blog one Groomdamental that will hopefully help all the fellas out and make your engagement and wedding planning process more enjoyable.
GROOMDAMENTAL #1 : KNOW YOUR WOMAN AND WHAT SHE WANTS
You are probably saying "Of course, I know my woman...that's why I love her and want to spend the rest of my life with her!" Well, sure you do. What I am saying is that before you get down on that right knee...you know, the one you injured playing football in high school....make sure that you have had some type of discussion with your lady about what being married means to her. I know that some of you like the whole "surprise" factor and you just want to come out of the blue with your proposal. That's fine, but have that talk first. Do it casually, it can be months before you actually propose. You should not only discuss what her "dream wedding" may be, but this may also be a good time to discuss LIFE with her as well, from career goals to how you will raise your future kiddos. These types of conversations can help both of you decide if marriage is in your future and most importantly it will give you a heads up on what to expect during the wedding planning process. If she describes her "dream wedding" as something similar to the famed Royal Wedding that took place earlier this year, then you better be ready to empty your pockets and roll up your sleeves because you got a BIG job ahead of you buddy!
Ultimately, these important discussions can help you both get an idea of how to financially plan for your wedding and it will give you a good indication of what to expect during your wedding planning process as a couple, which will in turn ease a lot of the stress that goes into planning your wedding.
Now, after you have had the talk with your lady, and you are absolutely sure that she is the woman for you, now it is time to plan the engagement! This is the part that you are supposed to SHINE on. It's your time, buddy! All eyes will be on you, so don't mess this up. She will remember this for the rest of her life!
Check back next month for
GROOMDAMENTAL #2 : PLANNING THE SECOND MOST IMPORTANT MOMENT IN YOUR LIFE. THE ENGAGEMENT.
The "Groomdamentals" are written by Jarrell Liner.
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If you have any questions or comments about this post, feel free to contact Jarrell Liner jarrell.liner@gmail.com
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